All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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