dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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