Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
