Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
