Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
This is classic penis vs brain.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
