brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Only a mothe r could love this liver
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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