are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Randomize
