then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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