We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
