at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
