yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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