i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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