matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize