just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
