I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
