Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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