I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
