It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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