I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
