??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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