yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize