Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
