Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize