Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
