i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
don't judge my taste in strippers
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
