One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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