Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
