Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
