You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
