I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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