Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
