I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
