I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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