do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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