wake up i wanna do it froggy style
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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