I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
babies were throwing up all over the place
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
