PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
handjob tips. give me some.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
