I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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