my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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