I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
