I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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