I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
