If i come over, it means nothing
Sponge bath it is.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
