Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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