he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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