Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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