Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
