My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
