Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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