Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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