We should be called the Road Head Warriors
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Two words: blizzard sex
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
