I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I need water and some morals
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize