These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
